I love this time of year....autumn...pumpkins...red and orange colors! There is a church in our community that sells pumpkins each year and we always go there to pick out a pumpkin for making a jack-o-lantern. My preschooler took his time to find the perfect one.

Starting the search...


Found one...but now want a bigger one...


Still looking...


Finally found one! Sitting on it making sure it's strong...


Taking the pumpkin in a ride...on the way to the car.


Cody (my nephew) also picked one out!


C'mon Halloween!!

We went to a local petting zoo yesterday. A mommy group planned the outing for this place in the morning (while my preschooler was at school.) My toddler and I checked it out and had a great time. There was a playground there, ponies to ride, a huge sandpile with lots of digging toys, and a petting zoo. It seemed like heaven to little kids!

We planned on returning later with my preschooler after he got out of school and after the toddler napped. We did a few errands and at some point, they were both asleep in the back seat in their car seats. When my preschooler woke up (he had fallen asleep for about 10 minutes), he said, "I took a little nap. That baby music is powerful." LOL! I had forgotten that our CD was playing in the car. We have several CDs with kid songs and music and I had put in a new baby einstein one earlier and it had some lullabies on it.

We did make it back to the petting zoo. When we returned, the animals hadn't eaten in a while and were quite hungry. There were many animals wanting some of the food that is in the tiny cup you get to feed them. What that means is that the animals swarmed us when we entered the area. It was my preschooler's first time there and it was quite scary for him. At some point, I wanted to take a picture of him in there. For a moment, he tried to give me a smile...but made sure he kept his eye on that big scary hungry goat right next to him!

Last year, I bought my daughter a mini-refrigerator during the August back to school sales and gave it to her for Christmas. She keeps it in her bedroom and lately, it's been empty. It's also a favorite place for my toddler to play...usually opening and closing it over and over. Surprise...he fits inside!

Last week, I had planned on going to meet some friends on a three day weekend with my kiddos. We were all packed and I was loading the car and checking off my list of things to do when I started feeling ill. So, I stopped and sat for a while while I took a break. As it turned out, I became violently ill. I also had fever and chills and became really weak. I spent the next several days also very weak (as I still am right now.) However, today (practically a week later), is the best I've felt since then.

My husband was at work and gone the whole week so I was incredibly thankful for my older brother (and nephew) for helping out every day! I sent that poor guy to the store (or to get food for us) each day too. On one day, he took my kiddos to his house and fed them (french toast and bacon.) He brought them back later and I smelled bacon on the toddler all day long, lol! By the evening,I was calling and begging him to cook the same for me as well........and he did!

Every once in a while, I forget what it's like to be sick and take being healthy for granted. I'm glad every once in a while, I get the message to slow down and enjoy each day as it comes by being slapped down by some illness. I was very fortunate that this was a temporary thing that is on it's way out... Having to do nothing for days makes me appreciate the option to be able to do anything else like go outside with my family or the dishes. I have huge piles of clean clothes in the hallway that need to be folded and that's the task tomorrow hopefully if I can get the energy. Meanwhile, I've had lots of quality counch time reading books to my kiddos and catching up on reruns on tv.

Julie tagged me with this Honest Scrap. The rules are that I have to tell you 10 things about myself and then tag 10 people to play along.

1. I have lived in the same city my whole life (and most of that time was in two different houses.)

2. My ultimate vacation would be driving the scenic routes around the United States in a small conversion van (like a RoadTrek) so that it can go over mountains smoothly.

3. I eat raisin bran for breakfast practically every morning.

4. I have weak ankles so I don't run or job. I have found that using the elliptical at the gym feels like I'm running and I love that feeling...

5. I love the movie "You've Got Mail" and cry everytime I see it.

6. I met the man who I ended up marrying when I was 15 at a skating rink.

7. I love to go camping (have actually only camped less than a dozen times.) I will be going again in November.

8. There are some times that I count down the minutes until my kids go to sleep and then miss them so much I that I secretly want to wake them up again for moments lost.

9. I am afraid of heights.

10. If you're reading this and want to play along, consider yourself tagged! I would love to get to know you better.

We went to a birthday party for a neighbor's daughter today at a park. While we all had a great time and I took a ton of pictures, there were many cute ones of my toddler that I wanted to share. He loves climbing and climbed up as I held my breath...



Then played peek-a-boo!


I just love his smile! How great it is to be one!


What SOOC photo do you have to share this SOOC Saturday {weekend}?

I have been working my behind off moving stuff at my mother-in-law's house (how I wish that was a literal statement!) I'm renting out her house to my brother (except a large room that used to be a garage in which I'm storing her furniture. I want her tiny nestegg to last as long as possible and the rent money will help. Her home is in such disarray that it would be in need of huge capital in order to rent it to anyone else. So, my nephew and I have been working in the mornings going through closets and moving furniture. I feel like her things shouldn't be disposed of or divided considering she's still alive. My dental hygienist suggested a book to me while I got my teeth cleaned last week, The Long Goodbye. She said her husband often referenced it in his line of work with the elderly...those with Alzheimers...they die slowly as their memories fade and away from the person you once loved... My legs are sore and I've packed many boxes thus far. We've been extremely productive and it feels great!

My poor preschooler woke up at 4am with an earache. (Well, both little kids were up then, and all morning, but that's another story.) He has had some allergies lately (time of year) and they got out of hand. By morning, he was punch drunk because he was so tired and yet full of energy to stay awake. He wavered between laughing and crying. When I asked why he was crying...he sobbed, I don't know. He just felt bad. We went in early to see the doctor and sure enough, sinus infection! The doctor also asked if he had been snoring. Why, yes! I had noticed that he was snoring a couple of times this week (never does) and that was also a sign he was getting sick. His schedule is way off. I noticed in the waiting room at the pediatrician's office that most kids were sitting on their parent's lap....as my own kid was doing....trying to feel better. Boy, I need a nap!

Last weekend, we visited my SIL who lives on a bay. We always enjoy going there and hanging out. This particular time, their bulkhead (the area where the water meets the dirt area on their property) was being rebuilt and my preschooler was hanging a great time on the CAT bobcat that was left behind. The owner of the equipment actually came by and gave him a ride and lesson in driving it. Talk about hanging a great time!!! He really loved it!


We enjoyed playing peek-a-boo! The toddler kept peeking from behind the wall and cackling afterwards!


Going treasure hunting at the boat dock area. He rode his bicycle with one training wheel down there and then carried his shovel all around looking for something good. We kept singing Pirate songs, especially one by The Backyardigans, and saying Aargh!


At night, we enjoyed fishing on the pier. Only one was caught and it escaped before being brought all the way up. At night, we turn on the lights to warm up the water where the fish congregate so we can catch them easier. On this particular night, there was no wind and all the insects swarmed under the lights.

I spent nine hours in the ER yesterday with my mother-in-law. I thought she had a heart attack but, after many tests and an overnight stay as observation, it turned out that she had just sprained her muscle under her breast (and it was very tender.) She doesn't remember doing it, of course, or anything else of significance.

It takes a lot of patience to sit with someone with Alzheimers at a place out of their comfort zone for such a long time. And each time she asked the same question over and over and over again, I answered it like it was the first time I had heard it. There were four areas in this particular room and we were all divided by a curtain. The man behind us had apparently swallowed about 30 pills in an attempt to kill himself. His wife was there, and she was pretty quiet, probably wondering why, and what now? I was thinking they were probably getting tired of hearing our conversation over and over. I tried to think of interesting things to talk about (as the time seemed to drag on.) She knows that her memory is failing and now is forgetting some words (as opposed to memory) in sentences. She also now doesn't remember her marriage nor her late husband (they had been married 51 years.) But in it all, at one point, she said something memorable. In reference to things (as in material objects), she said "Things are not important......People....People are important." I know that's very true. She had many pretty things and many with long stories behind them. They mean nothing now. It's the people that matter. She then squeezed my hand and again thanked me for being there. I hope the man behind us heard that.

I went to MIL's apartment to get some clean clothes for her this morning (anticipating her being discharged) and spoke to a lady who asked about her. The lady had recently had eye surgery and now her arm was in a case. I asked about her arm. She went on to explain that she had broken it in four places when she tripped in her room. Since she has such brittle bones (due to her age,) she wasn't sure if it would heal in the cast (and may need surgery.) She talked on about how she wishes she had good health. I spoke up and said that my MIL has great health but can't remember anything. I think I'd rather have bad health and at least remember my life. She agreed as we both shook her head in unison.

Slow and uninteresting week...today, a couple things happened.

I was pleasantly surprised by talking to both of my brothers' wives today. One lives in California and sent me a text that they found out today that their baby will be a girl (to be born next January.) My other sister-in-law came over to look at a house to rent on our street (two houses over.) I'm not close to either, per se, but love the fact that I have two sisters-in-law and hope to strengthen our relationships. Since these brothers who are married are younger than I am....and married much younger wives, their wives are both younger than my older daughter, specifically ages 22 and 23. Hmm...makes for interesting conversations. While I try to talk about family and vague topics, sometimes the 'mother' in me comes out and I feel like I want to tell them the best way to do things. I don't though...I don't want to seem like their mom...I just want to be a friend.

I also went to one of my favorite restaurants...Cheddars. My toddler LOVES the baked potato soup and eats it very well by himself. I love their food and it makes us both happy, lol! The atmosphere there is nice...it's cool, has large wicker fans in shapes of leaves slowly going around in an area (keeps toddlers occupied watching) and a large fish aquarium. After we fill up on great food and spill lots of soup on our shirts (just the toddler), we stand at the aquarium and point out different colored fish watching them swim around. Then, on the ride home, normally the toddler falls asleep and...all is well.

Years ago, I couldn't read a certain small font at work and bought some reading glasses to read it. Since then, slowly but surely, I can tell that my eyes are getting older (and I now use reading glasses at the computer.) I have noticed that I am doing what my own mom did at this age (squint and ask for clarification on certain numbers or letters.) I used to only need them for close-up reading but I've noticed in the last few weeks, that even farther away things are now blurry. I seem to carry reading classes around with me all the time (reading bedtime story at night, reading menus at restaurants, balancing the checkbook, and reading the newspaper.) The mornings are the worst. Ugh!! I guess I will soon bite the bullet and actually get my eyes checked. That's not the scary part...when I do get glasses, my biggest issue will be picking out frames.

Somehow, I found motivation to clean today! Mmmmm! I love the smell of a clean house! LOL! Obviously, it doesn't happen as often as it should. There are a few problem areas that I'm still trying to iron out. I feel so productive as I planned several goals and then followed through. Of course, I had to stop several times to play Wolverine and the X Men, to hold the toddler as his gums were hurting, and help the preschooler with puzzles. We took advantage of the quality time together while his brother was taking a nap (as puzzle pieces can become airborne or chewed up otherwise.) It could have been done much faster, but what fun is that? The preschooler insisted on helping in the kitchen mopping and later, the toddler insisted on helping to mop in the bathroom. Hopefully, I can keep that kind of help up, especially when they get to be teens, lol! It was a great day!

In addition, I even took my mother-in-law to lunch. I have never done that. She was the kind of lady who didn't eat out much and always had a reason to stay home or order out. Now that she can't remember much, she didn't know she didn't like to eat out. It was a little stressful...not because of her but because of the two kiddos I had with us. I ordered her food I knew she would enjoy. She ate slowly and we were finished long before she was. Perhaps it was because it was habit...that we rush through the meal before the kids lose interest and get loud. I ordered a bowl of ice cream for the kiddos to keep them entertained while she finished up. She was quiet most of the time but made a joke that she didn't get any ice cream. We all laughed. I realized a little later that she actually wanted some so I ordered some for her as well. Halfway through her ice cream, she asked why she was eating ice cream. LOL! I answered because she asked for it and it was really good. She agreed and finished it up. Yep, ice cream definitely brings out smiles and makes life good.

Today is day 4. I'm on a diet and I'm finally working out. I got a membership at a gym and have been going there as well. I'm so out of shape that I can only do about 30 minutes at a time. I'm looking forward to feeling better and getting more energy though. I haven't tried to really diet in um.....fifteen years or so. I have noticed I'm so tired at night though, even more than usual. I'd be nice to fit into my clothes better...I'm keeping my eye on the prize!

Just playing around at home (and with the camera!)

I often go see my mother-in-law in her apartment (at the assisted living facility.) I went today because I received a call that she bumped her head while falling early this morning and it was protocol to have her go to the hospital to get her checked out. Her head was fine. I called her before I went and she addressed me with my name and asked me to go visit her (and to bring the boys.) I had intended to so the toddler and I went and visited for a while.

I have pictures all over the walls for her. One thing I made for her has all of her kids names and pictures of her kids in order (vertically arranged on the wall.) One picture is of my husband (and the toddler) that is at a lever where it can be seen and touched by little ones. Of course, my toddler went up to it and was pointing to it, saying da-da. She didn't seem to notice. I hinted that the picture is of his dad (and said the name.) It was then that I realized that she didn't know who I was referring to. She read off all the names and then said she wasn't sure which picture was which (even though they were clearly arranged in such a way that it seemed obvious...and she used to know.)

So I asked the hundred million dollar question. I asked if she who I was related to (from the pictures on the wall.) In other words, who am I? Does she know anymore? And the answer, no.

I am a very kind person who will continue to visit her and bring little boys to visit and slather lotion on her hands, wash her clothes, keep her company and talk about the clouds in the sky. I changed the subject as to not make her feel like it mattered that she really didn't know. She mentioned earlier in the week when I visited that she saw me pass by and thought I was the Angel Gabriel and was so happy to see me. I took that as a compliment.

But as I walked out of the building toward my car, I noticed my eyes were a little wet. It's so sad to see so many memories fade away. I wish this wretched disease on nobody and wish there were a cure.

A few days ago, my family and I met a friend at a local restaurant. While we were eating, we heard the lady at the next table talking to her friend. She had a kind of a loud voice and her vocabulary included lots of profanity. I was amazed she didn't notice that we were staring at her or that there were kids around. My daughter decided, in her anger, that the best thing to do would be to cuss the lady out. I told her that she would then be just as bad as the lady was. So then I was stressing about keeping my daughter's rage under control as well as being angry at the patron near us. As it turned out, my husband took our little ones to the playground located down the hall (of the mall where the restaurant was located.) My daughter then left as I was getting ready to pay the bill. The foul mouthed lady actually got up to pay and was right behind me in line. For the life of me, as much as I wanted to say something to her, I couldn't even open my mouth. I have thought about it so many times since then about what I should have said to her. She was discussing her drinking habits with the guy she ate lunch with and I thought to myself that her whole demeanor and tone probably meant that whatever I said wouldn't have phased her a bit. But, I am still kicking myself for not having found a way to diplomatically urge her to notice next time who was sitting near her or to talk quieter, or anything. Ugh!

This past weekend, we had a party and celebrated our twenty-fifth wedding anniversary with our family and friends. It was a lovely day and we had LOTS of food! It was wonderful to see so many people come by and say hello. We extended the event to last all day so anybody could come by for a few minutes or to stay all day. We are very blessed! The next day, we were SO tired. The house was a mess and we just rested a lot. At one point, I looked down and the toddler was sitting right in the middle of the empty steam table pans. Rather than get him out, I reached down and grabbed my camera!


For more fun with SOOC Saturday or to participate yourself visit Melody at slurpinglife.typepad.com

Candid Picture...of my boys.

My preschooler is in the bathroom doing his business reading his ABC book while his toddler brother looks on. My husband is sitting on the side of the bathtub reading the newspaper keeping them company.

We went to the beach this week for a few hours. I had forgotten how the sand feels after you get wet and the total stickiness (is that even a word?) Since I had to be so close to my youngest, I didn't go looking for shells or beach treasures. I just watched them enjoy a different sort of playground.

Naturally, the kids were so busy playing that they didn't want to pose for any pictures and just wanted to play. I enjoy this picture because my smallest just sat for a while and watched the waves.


And, since there were storms in the area, the waves for larger than normal, and it was fun watching them come in and out again. Here, my preschooler just lays in the water as the waves go back and forth over him.


And my favorite...crawling out to sea.

I have been writing down the books we read aloud this summer down as part of a summer reading program for my preschooler. Yesterday, we turned in the form and listened to a presentation about strangers from a police officer. It was a sad quick talk (of no significance) but the officer let the kiddos go look and sit in his police car. Now, that was the cool part for the kids. There was a moment where my preschooler turned around and had an expression of joy/confidence with barely a hint of a smile. It was an expression I've seen only a couple times. He didn't even say anything but I could see in his face and he kinda walked over and stood into me (while waiting for his turn to go see the police car.) By this time, he was patiently waiting for his turn to go outside and was incredibly patient. He got his turn and had a blast! I didn't realize that the back of the police cars were plastic seats (in our area) and that there was Plexiglas between the two seats. Afterwards, we went back in the library's children's section and sat in bean bag chairs (and read books.) At one point, we laid back and looked up. There were cool ceiling windows and a really high circular area. I put the baby on my chest and we both looked up. While he wasn't really sure what we were looking at as we leaned back and looked up, I pointed out all the things we could see above and told him what they were. I realized he was really paying attention and also pointing just like I had. For him to lay still for such a long time, I took advantage of it. I just loved smelling his neck/hair while I was talking to him. Our cheeks were next to each other and his skin was soft I enjoyed taking advantage of his curiosity to hold him as long as possible. It turned out to be more fun than I expected. An ordinary errand turned out to be a fun morning!!

Wow! Talk about FAST cleaning! A couple of friends were in the neighborhood (one was picking another up from a doctor's appointment) and asked to pop by to use the bathroom and/or hang out a bit. I said, sure! Then, it hit me...OMG! The place is a mess! I went into turbo overdrive...a speed I hadn't had in a long time I think. I managed to clean the kitchen (including dirty dishes from last night), vacuum the living room and halls and clean the bathroom in 30 minutes!! I swept but didn't actually do the real cleaning on the kitchen floor...there wasn't enough time for that. I'm feeling much better now. What's ironic is that they didn't come. They also said something in the original call that we could all go to lunch close by at 11 and it's getting close so I imagine that we'll all just meet there instead. I even sneaked a shower in too (no make-up though.) Of course, my kiddos are sharing dry lucky charms and I've noticed some on the carpet....sigh.

I went grocery shopping today. I really look forward to this task I do at least once a week. There are times that I only go do a great intensive shopping trip once or twice a month (and get milk and a few things weekly.) But I love looking around at different stores for new interesting things to eat (via sampling) or recognizing ingredients I had forgotten about in hopes of making a forgotten recipe. This afternoon, I took my teenager as well as the little boys. My preschooler was Wolverine today (complete in his mostly yellow costume and yellow and black mask.) He asked if he could wear it to the store and told him, sure. Naturally, my teen was having a fit thinking that she would be embarrassed or that he might cause people to look our way. I didn't care because he loves his costume and you can only get away with that at this age for a short time and then you're expected to conform (wear 'normal clothes' and play dress-up only at home.) I love his excitement when he pretends with his costume and voice and when he takes on the behaviors/phrases of his current superhero character. As it turned out, it was a positive experience and she even suggested he put on his mask to top off his whole wardrobe. That was wonderful to watch in and of itself. We did well during this trip not buying a lot of junk food. It was amazing how much fruit we bought as we normally don't buy a lot. I have eaten cherries this week. I haven't eaten cherries since I was a little girl. I don't know why I quit eating them either. I bought a bag a few days ago and have practically eaten the whole bag by myself. I bought another and will eat fruit when I get the urge to eat something sweet.

And a wonderful, scary, noisy thunderstorm rounded off the day giving us our much needed rain. It's still sprinking outside.

What a great day!

We were away for a week! Had a nice relaxing time at a relative's house! Of course, Optimus Prime (from the Transformers) had to go with us:







And I enjoyed another birthday!! I love celebrating them and especially, picking out my own birthday cake! Luckily, my sister-in-law Patti made me one....a Texas Sheet (sheath) cake! Mmmmmm!!

I have lived in this house for a year and a half. I moved from another house where I lived for over 20 years. I have yet to put any pictures on the walls, lol! I have many beautiful frames and pictures but enjoy the bare beautiful uncluttered walls that I haven't gotten around to arranging pictures. I don't really have any company to speak of either so I haven't been motivated to do anything about it either. I am going to pick up a picture tomorrow (a family one that was taken a couple of weeks ago) and will finally put it (and other pictures) up. I haven't had a 'family picture' made in over 15 years...and the one before that was when I was still a kid at home. I ought to take family pictures more often. It always seems that I'm the one taking pictures so I have albums and albums full of my family (those other than me) and have only taken professional pictures once in a blue moon. I am so excited about getting the picture tomorrow!!! Here's to change!

When my house gets dirty, I try to clean up a room at a time. I started in an inner closet today and then thought of an idea. What if I could move some furniture around to make the room better? So, I changed a bunch of stuff up! I now have a tiny room that includes a twin bed for a nap bed for my preschooler so that he can sleep there without toys (or in a room with a sleeping baby brother having to be extremely quiet) and a bookshelf with books if he wants to read before/after his nap. It took practically all day to move the stuff around (and move the bed from the other side of the house into there.) Unfortunately, all the other tasks were neglected, but I'm really happy with how it turned out. It can even be a small guest bedroom (ok, so it doesn't have a door but....it works.) I am going to try to tackle that huge mound of clean clothes tomorrow. I always feel so much better when things are in their place and it smells clean. That is my goal this week....summer cleaning! My fingers are crossed!

It's almost the end of crawfish season. We decided to have one last crawfish boil. It was a good time to sit and enjoy the afternoon too.

Crawfish up close.


Cooking them.


Transferring them into an old icechest to keep hot.


Enjoying conversation with family...


...and entertainment.

I had no idea so many alligators lived in my neck of the woods. A recent news story about an alligator being found swimming in a local swimming pool prompted us to check out a nearby 'gator place. It was awesome! There was a restaurant there that also served alligator (although they buy it and don't serve the alligators who live there.) I chose to get something else though (I've eaten alligator before...tastes like chicken!) We fed them hot dogs via weedeater line that is tied along the raised wooden areas above the manmade ponds for them. We had great time!

There were a few other 'friends' there too.



I had to 'beg' to get a picture of him he was interested in watching the alligators and turtles swim around.


Getting a pic with the owner!

I've enjoyed some quiet time away from my baby this last week as he gets so tired that he goes to be around 7 or 7:30pm instead of an hour later as usual. The only drawback is that he gets up an hour earlier. I am not a 5am person!!! I repeat, I don't like waking up at 5!!! Ugh! I am just not very productive that early in the morning! I guess, I should start doing something to ease the guilt though. Perhaps I can start filling in his baby book that I've been neglecting for months.

Where's the baby?


Peek-a-boo!


Wait...big brother wants to get involved too!!


It's just another day at home....

I bought a fake snake for my preschooler yesterday from Target, our favorite store. Since he already had one already, having them together made him very creative today. This morning, he wanted to go on a snake safari. He had gone out and placed his fake snakes in the yard and when I went out with him, it made it fun to go 'hunting' for them. He had a little device that he would pretend to shoot them and then pick them up to put in his little plastic bucket. Who would have thought....a snake safari! LOL!

I've spent most of the day cleaning...it seems the more I clean, the more it gets messed up! I think I'll just take a break until the kiddos go to sleep. I'm currently wanting for the pizza delivery person. :)

I love gardenias. It's my favorite flower! This morning, I picked bunches of gardenias from my gardenia bushes in the yard. My husband had propagated several bushes from one bush years ago and each year, they get bigger and have more flowers. The flowers are so fragrant that it makes the each room smell great! We often give a bouquet of them to our neighbors. As a child, my window was near a gardenia bush and whenever I opened my window, I could smell them. And when I was older, I used to bring them to work and the whole hall where my office was located had the gardenia scent. It's amazing how nature produces such a sweet lovely scent....


Here are a couple bunches I grabbed this morning (I took the pic late tonight.) They still look good. I just noticed the tomatoes behind them (from the tomato plants we planted weeks ago.)

Today was last day at PK3 school for my preschooler (3 year old class that was a few days a week for half a day.) I really liked his teacher (she was wonderful especially when we were dealing with a few issues in the beginning.) My kiddo made great friends and I made a few acquaintances and a friend from there.

I just went through his stuff that we took home including a video that his teacher made for all the kids. It was a compilation of a lot of pictures of the kids throughout the year, for special occasions and in the daily schedule (recess, computer, library, etc.)

The pictures were shown with songs (great ones) and seeing my own kid (as he changed throughout the year) along with his classmates, I cried like a baby.

How thoughtful of her to do that! I will cherish that for many years as he grows up...how quickly a year has gone. Sigh.....

I went to a Senior Recognition Award Ceremony last night. My daughter has spent the last couple years trying to make up credits in order to graduate. She hasn't graduated from school yet because she has to first pass two parts of the state achievement test, but she will have finished the credits in order to graduate this year. Hopefully, she can get actually finish in July, and/or October when she retakes the tests. It was a nice ceremony and she was very pretty! She has had a very difficult time in school and has overcome some obstacles in order to go this far. Her attention deficit and other issues with her learning made school really stressful for her. I am very proud of her.

It's summer again! Hot, humid, mosquitos and grass! Luckily, my kids LOVE to mow grass!


They have been playing outside a lot lately. My preschooler will often push the baby around...and they both really enjoy it!!!


At the end of the day, they sleep well.

Here, take it, I had a good day! That's what I said to the man at the store who walked my cart full of groceries out to the car and unloaded them for me. All I had was a $5 dollar bill so I offered it to him. He said, no, that's too much. He was an older gentleman, probably in his sixties, and he let me know of a sale of soft drinks at another store (with a good deal on them as he noticed I had bought some.) It was a good day...my mother-in-law was happy and I was feeling like my shoulders were being unburdened. I insisted he take it and I wanted him to feel as happy as I was right then.

My mother-in-law can't remember whether all of her kids are alive at times or where she is...I bet living alone in her house was incredibly lonely and scary for her. She is happier now at this assisted living home and has people around her who are really nice to her. This afternoon, she had the hugest smile on her face when I went to see her. She's had a good day too.

What a week! So tiring, emotionally and physically. My youngest son was sick (it's been a week and he's finally feeling a little better) with a sinus infection that left him very congested and unable to nurse. He just wanted to be held and sleep well. There were a couple of nights that I stayed awake most of the night because it was stressful to hear him trying to breathe through his nose, then cough, then wake himself up and repeat the cycle. Fortunately, that only lasted two nights.

And the stress of moving my mother-in-law into her new apartment, empathizing with her feelings (of not going back home as well as being frightened in a new place), and having inlaws come stay with me (so that they can also support their mom as she moves.)

It was a really long week. Yesterday morning, my husband mentioned wanting to see my youngest son smile. Usually a happy baby who is always smiling, he has had a blank face or one of pain/discomfort. This afternoon, though, he started smiling again and my husband quickly alerted me to his smile! He's feeling a lot better...and so are we.

If I were a millionaire, I'd have my hair washed and fixed by someone else every single day! I absolutely love that feeling as well as how it looks when someone else does it. It always seems to look better too!

My hair has grown so slowly in the past decade that it takes forever to grow enough to have to get cut. Earlier today, I remembered about fifteen years ago that it was so thick that I couldn't even put it in a pony tail because it was so heavy. Ugh! Now, it's so thin that pony tail holders seem to fall out! As I watched my mother-in-law get her hair set today with her very thin strands of gray dry hair, I thought to myself, she was probably envying my hair. I should enjoy what I have and be thankful!

I still like the dream though...and maybe one day,k I'll win the lottery!

With all the recent steps insuring my mother-in-law gets the best of care with what she can afford, I keep hearing over and over to invest in Long Term Care Insurance now, while I'm young. And you know what, I had no idea how much it cost to live somewhere like at an assisted-living facility. For instance, my mother-in-law does not have any Long Term Care Insurance therefore has to pay out of pocket if we want her to be in a place other than a nursing home (which would be paid by medicare because she doesn't have much money.) It costs around $4,000 dollars to share a room with someone else at an assisted living place here where we live.

I finally found one which has a studio apartment where she doesn't have to share (a big room where she can put a bed and a couple of chairs which is huge compared to the half rooms I have seen at other places.) Since she is a widow of a soldier who served during war time, she may be eligible for a little money from the VA but it's going to take up to 6 months for it to kick in. So, of what little money she does have, it'll go toward that assisted living until it's used up, then she'll go to a nursing home (hopefully in a couple of years or longer.) We may rent out her house to subsidize her when her money runs out but as it appears now, we'll be taking care of her taxes and house insurance out of our pocket. She'll still going to have a deficit of about $2,000 each month. How sad... I can't see putting her somewhere like in a nursing home where she shares half a room...there is no room for anything except a bed for each resident (and a tv stand maybe.)

She had 8 kids...5 are still alive and has grandkids and great grandkids. But for her illness, it is quite burdensome to whoever cares for her. I love her but can't do it. You have to really love someone to care for them in this situation. While I do, I don't have the time with two small kids and the work schedule of my husband. But, I'm doing the very next best thing. And, I'm going to be looking into this insurance...I don't want my kids or grandkids to be in my shoes right now.

Decisionmaking is so difficult when you have such big decisions to make. I have to decide what to do about caring for my elderly mother-in-law now. She isn't able to care for herself. She doesn't have enough income to afford an assisted living facility. She has been in the hospital several days and they've determined she can't live on her own and probably has early Alzheimer's. So, what to do.... I'm debating on the outcome...find someone to live with her at home, move in with her, have her move in with us (no, scratch that idea), rent her home out to have enough income to afford an assisted living facility (we'd still need to pay for some of it.) I have such big pits in my stomach with the thought of someone not being patient or mean to her (because, really, she's a pain...she can be a really mean person and is so set in her ways and grumpy.) I want to do the best for her and am spending a lot of time getting all my information in order to make the best one. For now, they're trying to find a nursing home for her (for low level physical therapy) so that we have time to make that final decision. Sigh....actually, it's almost a panic attack I feel at times because I'm so torn up on all of this. I've tried cleaning her home up a bit and have someone doing intensive cleaning tomorrow. I want her to be comfortable, but safe and when she's not taking her medication properly, losing her mail, forgetting important people and relationships from time to time, there's a problem. That I know...and I have to continue thinking that I'm doing the best for her.

The climbing stage...I had forgotten about it. It seems that it's all my baby does. He has recently climbed onto and into everything! I found him earlier climbing from the little wooden rocking chair onto the living room table (a good two feet off the floor) earlier. He keeps crawling onto the couch (after his big brother takes the cushions off.) Unfortunately, his balance skills aren't perfected so he's a bit wobbly and I need to stay close, just in case. He loves stairs too. He crawled onto his walker (it wasn't made to climb on) and when his little feet got all crooked inside, he put out the loudest shrill distinctly making sure he was heard and needed help, fast! All these new climbing skills have happened in just a few short days...I love watching him learn new fun stuff and enjoy watching his excitement afterwards.

This is where I found him this afternoon.

Let's Make Blueberry Pie! exclaims my preschooler!



He picked a handful of dewberries (similar to blackberries) outside on the fenceline and wanted to know how to make a blueberry pie! On the way back in the house, I was making conversation and I told him he needed berries, sugar, and a little flour. A little while later, I noticed him crawling up on the counter and a few minutes later realized he had the flour out. I told him he needed a WHOLE LOT more berries to make it.

And then, I went and put the baby down for a nap.

When I returned several minutes later, he told me that that he made blueberry pie (with a big proud smile) and then opened the oven to show me. Fortunately, he doesn't know how to turn it on and I don't plan on teaching him, lol! I noticed a pan in the sink he used to mix everything up in. I reached in the oven and took out this pan and...it's his pie...full of flour, bread and a few berries.



I loved making mud pies as a kid. I encouraged my daughters when they were young to be creative and they made 'potions' out of food and sauces. I guess this line of thinking has spilled over onto him as well. I hope so.

As each day progresses, there are times I think...oh, I can write about this later in my blog but later on...it doesn't seem that important or interesting. I decided today to write something whether I think it's interesting or not.

We can now allow the baby to crawl outside in the grass and not worry too much about him eating everything in sight. This afternoon, while we were out there sitting under the trees enjoying the cool shade, I watched the baby crawl far away. He just crawled a certain distance and then sat in a large patch of clover. He just sat there for quite a while, pulling out the clover, tasting a few, and testing his independence. It was nice watching him and savoring what life is about...the little moments.